Back in September, right before Labor Day, I had an accident. I took my son to an event in a city I didn’t know. Everything was fine until we exited the parking lot to go home. We had an encounter with a deer and a concrete barrier.
The result was extensive damage to my husband’s truck. Thank God for Progressive Insurance! They were angels to us. Minus the deductible, Progressive covered $9,000 worth of damage which included a new running board, 2 new doors and the whole bed of the truck being redone.
I’ve never had an accident of that magnitude. I actually thought my husband was going to divorce me over what I’ve done to his truck. Needless to say he pretty much banned me from driving it. I can’t blame him and to be quite honest, I didn’t want to drive ever again.
Loss of freedom that comes from driving didn’t mean nearly as much to me as having an other accident. I was petrified. God was gracious. No one was hurt. No other cars were involved. I have no idea what happened to the deer after she initially hit us. I do know we didn’t do any damage to the concrete barrier.
So now, almost 2 months afterwards, my husband said to me I’m too tired to drive him to youth group tonight. In all honesty my son would rather cut off his right arm then miss youth group. It’s his ministry. He serves as a student leader and it’s where his heart is. Saying no is the equivalent of telling him he can’t serve God this evening.
My husband handed me the keys and said don’t repeat the same mistake. Now to be fair to me it really wasn’t my mistake. Neither my son nor I ever saw that deer come off the hill. It happened so fast that I literally was in shock when I went home. So it wasn’t like I had pulled out in front of someone or I had run a stop sign. It was an accident in its truest form of the word.
However, like I told the lady from Progressive, this truck is a family member. It’s my husband’s baby. Sometimes I think he loves it more than me. Real talk. So I told my son it was time to go. I sat down in the truck and I prayed.
I asked the Lord for extra angels, extra wisdom, extra strength, and peace. Again, He’s a gracious God and a good, good father. He calmed my hands and gave my 15 year old the words to say to calm my nerves. It wasn’t easy and it’s not going to be for quite some time. But it would have been worse if I had backed down and said no. My son would have missed the opportunity to serve our Lord and they always say that when you have something bad happen you’ve got to get right back up on that horse.
It sounds funny to say but I honestly wondered if I had forgotten how to drive. Earlier this year, my mother, who also suffers from Parkinson’s, had made the decision that she was no longer safely able to drive and she gave up her car and her license. She relies on Uber. Where we live, Uber doesn’t come. So I would have to rely on family to take me anywhere I would need to go.
But, honestly, I don’t think it’s God’s will for me to not drive right yet. I think He desperately wanted for me to face my fear tonight. I believeHhe wanted to show me that I was 100% reliant on Him for my safety and my son’s all the time in any circumstance. And I am more than happy to relinquish that control to the Lord to keep me safe.