I happened to notice last night, as I prayed before bed, that my prayers have grown a bit, well, grumpy. I listened to my language and how I was approaching the prayer. Where was my gratitude? I heard very little praise or even contentment.
Yesterday as particularly frustrating. The last several months have been, actually. If I’m being honest, this year has not gone how I imagined it would go. Between illnesses, family drama, and other general crap, I could complain 24/7. But, I know I shouldn’t. It doesn’t accomplish anything, really. It’s just an instant gratification of getting off my chest then I feel slighted all over again.
Last night’s prayer did accomplish one thing, though. I am now aware of how I ‘sound’ when I am replaying my day. So I am determined, effective immediately, to put a new spin on my speech. Yes, we had to take an unnecessary trip to Urgent Care yesterday due to our 14 year old’s failure to communicate his illness properly. BUT, he is healthy and wasn’t diagnosed with anything but a common cold. Yes, I was stuck at the eye doctor for an extra hour while my husband took our son to the Urgent Care. BUT, while the wait itself was boring, I am grateful that I was able to go to the eye doctor at all & got a clean eye care report. Plus, having only one vehicle is cost-effective and it’s a blessing that my son has a Dad who cares.
By spinning my words & thoughts, I am choosing my attitude. I don’t want to be an angry bitter person. I refuse. So, while I can’t promise to never be negative, I am going to continue to try my best to have a more Christ-like attitude.